Sexual Pleasure is not a sin
Only the heart and mind contributes to one’s Inner spirit (the location of the Good God’s spirit in a person) and thus it is impossible to “sin below the waist”.
Sexual pleasure is given by the Good God as a small indication of what reunion with the Good God might be like. Sexual pleasure is not sinful but the mindless procreation of children is. From a belief that birth of children should be carefully controlled, and limited to a small number of “Good God’s Heroes” that some expertise in contraception was needed. However if sexual pleasure is to remind us of how important the reunion with the good god is to us all then expertise in giving and receiving pleasure must also be gained.
“The Courts of Love
To achieve these ends the control of sexual activity is put totally in the hands of women, through the “Courts of Love”. Women play a central role in the propagation and maintenance of the faith. Cathar education includes extensive sexual education including practical experience under the guidance of tutors to ensure that the etiquette of the courts of love and ways of giving and receiving pleasure without conceiving children can be understood by all believers (credentes).